I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
I was in holding with a guy that got a DUI on a hover round. He was so nice. We're hanging out tonight.
We are going to be Siegfried and Roy for Halloween and you are going to be the tiger.
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
I'm going for high school drunk, you've got 15 minutes to get here.
I definitely think in addition to buying paint ball guns this summer we should invest in a breathalyzer. That way every drunk night turns into a competition, who can blow over the legal limit more. The loser gets shot while hungover. Shit goes hand in hand if you ask me.
Plus now I feel weird sleeping with you. It's like shooting a three legged deer. It's already at a disadvantage and couldn't get what it's full potential deserves.
I went eBay shopping last night. Turns out I brought a Viking drinking horn. I can't even be mad.
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
We were making fun of some people having sex on the beach, an hour later we were having sex on a golf course
Went online to check my credit card... $147.87 at Waffle House. $632.36 at "Red Rose Gentleman's Club" and a $1000 cash advance from an ATM. I may no longer be a fiancé.
I woke up and there was a huge blow up palm tree in my bed...
Randomize