Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
I definitely recall eating shredded cheese out of the bag while you were wearing that apron.
I dont feel as bad coming home this baked because I gave my 14 year old sister a no drugs talk last night.
All i've had today is coffee and ketchup packets. I need a job like yesterday.
Good news. I heard back from the doctor and I don't have a liver problem.
...yet.
we were hooking up and then he goes "you can touch my penis" and i laughed too hard to do anything. no second date.
Okay. How did someone manage to piss on TOP of a urinal? What giant is roaming around with a prick five feet from the ground?
Add caroling to the list of things we need to do in an elevator
My ninety day supply of adderal just came in the mail and I literally just dumped all 180 pills into my hands and laughed like a maniac. Shits about to get cray
He was like low grade Riff Raff, but I hit it. Twice. His grill popped out the second time.
You know it was a weird week when you have a mystery bruise and youre unsure if it was from crazy sex or getting bit by a duck. Life.
Basically one minute I'm sucking on her nipples and then 45 mins later we're at work and she's my boss.
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
I just got out of the shower and I feel like I just washed off 10 lbs of bad decisions...
Randomize
