Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
time to smoke my breakfast
Before he took my jeans off all he said was "no hard feelings from middle school right?"
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
I just sneezed cum. He better have a damn good day at work.
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
I woke up this morning to find a stuffed animal submerged in the toilet. I'm not entirely sure if it was the cat or Kara.
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
Today I had sex and flossed at the same time. My relationship goals have been exceeded.
Yo whoever left a thong on the dining room table, first of all get help second of all please remove it now
Hard not to be concerned when you call me, tell me you've discovered the secret to flying, vomit, then hang up the phone. So yes, I'm coming to pick you up.
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
yeah the highlight of my day was the 911 operator telling me they had frantically been trying to figure out where i was
She couldn't find her toothbrush so I had to wait while she sucked on the 12 peppermints she found under the couch. Pretty resourceful for her level of intoxication.
Randomize
