I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
totally watching dr. phil and getting eaten out right now. be jealous.
low key just jizzed in a chinese food container
Trying to figure out if I'm the second dude she hooked up with yesterday. I feel like a consolation prize
I left him a voicemail saying i went through with the abortion and he texts me back one thing... the bbm "phew" face. really?
He got thrown out for leaning over the bar topless and pouring himself some beer while singing the james bond song
and let me tell you something, handcuffs are surprisingly uncomfortable when they arent being used in a sexual manner
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
I came in and I guess my parents didn't hear me. My dad just said "Don't be lazy, RIDE IT." to my mom. Never coming home again.
There's glitter in my speakers, piles of cheezits on the floor, a random Audi in the driveway and a homeless dude napping in a lawn chair in the backyard. Wtf happened last night?
The cop left me alone after I gave her my spare snow cone. It was a hot and humid day and that uniform looked stuffy. Yay stoner me for overindulging in icy treats.
You kept trying to make people drink "salsa-ritas." But all you did was dump tequila in a half full jar of salsa, and shove it in people's faces while shouting at them.
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
Randomize
