If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
I found the seven page love letter I had written you. I'm sorry i was so obsessed.
We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
Saxophones in my mind. I swear someone dosed me.
It might have taken me 30 minutes but I finally finished the toast I made. That hungover.
These welts and bruises from letting gay boys whip my thighs last night are a clear indication i should lay off the tequila.
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
I was like can I please fuck your hips back into realignment
Strip clubs it is bday boy. One condition. I am in full custody of your ID. I plan on being in no condition to coordinate rescue operations and we need to keep casualties to a minimum. You cannot be trusted.
Alright goddamnit. Can I bring my pirate hat?
I insist.
NOT ALL OF US HAVE THE HANDS OF GODDAMN ANGELS YOU KNOW
I'm talking to this guy I met online about French toast. I am the oddest fucking combination of hungry and horny. Wtf brain.
I cannot believe I am seriously having a conversation about my best friend's sexual prowess as a dream lesbian.
Why are there naked heterosexuals in my apartment?
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