how the fuck does easy mac keep making itself at 3am when i'm wasted? what is this phenomenon?
you dont have to exercise, you threw up last night!
She was wasted. Kept yelling "what if I'm pregnant" and trying to push me into the tree. First and last time I bring a girl to my family christmas party.
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
Attention: due to the power outage we will not be playing drinking games and watching the royal wedding. Bring your own bottle and we'll just drink in silence.
You know how I've been hooking up with my ex? Well he told me he loved me and I said I was just there for sex so let's get it done. He looked sad, but he did it anyways. And life was good again.
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
All I want is to get as high as I did that time I started hallucinating that my brother was becoming a monkey and I saw my mum on every surface of your room.
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
Woke up and took my pants off only to realize that I was wearing my shirt from last night as my underwear
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
The reason why I poison my organs is so that you guys can't sell them.
We found him. He just came running out of the closet with a bruise on his face saying he has been fighting elves in Narnia for a year.
Randomize
