He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
your ability to fuck hot guys even when you go out in sweats amazes me
Yeah it was hard to find an opportunity while fucking him to say "oh the reason my lips taste so salty is because i blew your roomate 15 minutes ago"
ive realized i need to start an "avoid moving in with my parents after graduation" fund
This is my transition from small talk texts to booty call texts. Coming over?
Quite the smooth talker. There in 5.
He would have to make magical things happen in my nether regions to actually make me vote republican.
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
Just told some little girl not to judge me as I brushed my teeth in the target bathroom
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
IM HUNGOVER AT MOTHERS DAY BRUNCH AND A NUN FROM CHURCH JOINED US
Got really high to see my fist college experience unfold. Too high to find my classroom but I found the McDonald's down the street
I was sitting here smiling wondering why i'm so fucking happy at work. cookie has kicked in
If you need me I'll be getting drunk in a chewbacca onsie like a real adult.
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