i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
I just finished deleting miscellaneous contacts from my phone ... time for a HIV test!
Euphemism? No, "pantsless vodka yoga" is a legitimate pastime of mine
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
Also, I'm going to yoga because I have a Taylor Swift range of emotions right now.
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
He showed up riding a bike blasting the ghostbusters theme song. His name was Lasercat. Im in love.
I wonder how drunk we can get before Christmas Caroling turns into trespassing.
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
I just realized I had arrested my one night stand from last night...
I need to take my iPad to the Apple store (when this is all over). Do I need to delete all my dick pics/videos or are they used to stumbling across that sort of thing?
She’s the kind of asshole whose face I want to put on a T-shirt just so I can go outside and burn it.
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