Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
so she finally agreed to being friends with benefits. not only did I take her virginity, when I woke up, she brought me French toast made with homemade bread in bed.
I worship thee.
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
Woke up eating a pickle on the bathroom floor this morning in some random guys sweat pants.
MY INSIDES ARE BASICALLY BEING WRUNG BY A CHAINSAW IM NEVER TAKING PLAN B AGAIN
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
I had to put my dog down, accidentally outed my brother, and was given a fucking fish sandwich instead of a Big Mac ALL IN ONE DAY! Am I really the person you want to consult for advice? Hhhmmmmmm?
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
i thought the time we went to a party with no shoes on was bad, how about the time you left with no pants on?
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