you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
how bad would it be if i made his twitter my home page?
Before you become official, we should get a hotel room and fuck our brains out. Sort of like a going away party for your penis.
This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
I woke up with flowers, a tiara & pasta salad in my bed. Tequila makes me act like a fat Disney princess
I don't listen when you talk. I just try to find new creative ways to get you to send me naked pictures.
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
I found her outside drinking steak sauce out of the bottle.
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
His front door was open but I INSISTED on army crawling FOOT FIRST under the garage door. Then I peed the bed.
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
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