I just saw how many times I called you last night. You're welcome.
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
My cat clawed my face because i tried to give it a foot massage...never doing shrooms again.
Super awkward that I just now realized I added no verb to the first statement about super hero porn. We were watching it, not making it. Clarity.
It's Wednesday. And it's about that time to remind everyone that my priorities from last weekend have not changed moving forward into this weekend.
I am just saying if Clark Kent walks into your life, you fuck him
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
I just spent the better half of my Friday night alone, naked eating McDonalds. Not my worst start of a new year
I'm not a whore anymore. I gave up 90% of my women for you. I'm a 4-5 woman kind of guy now.
I baked a frozen pizza completely, put it back in the plastic and box, and put it back in the freezer. THAT drunk.
Teach me the ways of your demonic sorcery.
I need a hoe opinion
go on
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
Randomize
