i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
I asked for a steak knife but the waitress could see in my eyes it was a bad idea
I'm going for high school drunk, you've got 15 minutes to get here.
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
It was a fight. Me vs nature and drunkenness. And nature won. Big time.
You can't be friends with my side piece. Conflict of interest.
My one night stand said I love you, opened my fridge, stole my cream cheese and left.
what is considered shitting yourself?
Like my underwear wasn't soiled, but there was definitely a departure from my asshole.
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
Randomize
