and if it starts getting weird im just going to tell him i used to be a man
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
It started as a joke and ended with a trip to the emergency room, a broken macbook and a gigantic hole in the concrete of my driveway.
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
If you find my purse on your yacht please call me - girl you slept with after yacht party
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
I was woken up at 6 am by a second grader trying to give me a sweatshirt for a pillow
The night got interesting when the random guy next to us handed us a bottle of champagne and the rest of his ciroc bottle. When we asked why he did it, he proceeded to point at his friend who face planted the floor.
I can't find the remote or the Doritos. Someone call 911. S.O.S. I sent this in Braille.
im half tempted just to scoot up to him and whisper "I'm not wearing underwear" but idk if thats a heartfelt apology
I vaguely remember a drunken mid sex pinky promise to not let it get weird.
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
One of the worst parts about living at my parents again is trying to hide how often I'm hungover, just quietly puked in the basement bathroom while my mom got ready for work
are you watching the world series?
I've made out with alex bregman... so yes
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