the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
Drunken candy land NOW. Dont fight the urge... you want to.
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
I wish i could make my toaster dance like they do in the second ghostbusters. But i dont have ectoplasmic goo. Or a toaster.
He sent me a video of himself jacking off. I am not kidding.
WTF??? Isn't he married??
Yeah but his wife is at a birthday party and I guess he's bored. LOL
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
Let me make this really simple. We woke up this morning and fucked three times. When I got up and took a shower she cleaned up the mess from last night and did the dishes. Then we went out and she bought me brunch. I don't give a FUCK how much you don't like her.
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
I keeping finding meatballs in random places
Oh dear. Sending much love.
Just send a machete.
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
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