Bro, I met the coolest hottest chick tonight and she has the hottest friends.
Where are you?
Strip Club
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
I'm surrounded by too many unhungover people.
I should take him calling me "a freak of nature" after sex as a compliment, right??
im hiding in a corner. drunk. with a plate of stolen jello shots. im pretty sure people are looking for me or the jello shots.
I just had to MC for a middle school event with jizz on my dress. I'm going to hell.
Jk. Anyone who everbeers with me is my type.
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
No seriously you guys are gonna get arrested
Do me a favor I want you to reach down the front of your pants and underwear and just feel around for a while... if you happen to find your balls then join us
Come over. And we'll put iced coffee in the bong.
FUCK YOU VODKA I'M TRYING TO ADULT RIGHT NOW
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
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