You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
The lesbians are drunkenly meowing in the hallway again. This is the shit I'll miss at home.
Right before he passed out, he said "Stuporman, coming in for a landing"
You didn't see us wave? How could you not? We were all going like 10mph screaming at you. We were stoned and didnt wanna run over pedestrians
I thought stuff was gonna go really bad after he filled the super-soaker with kerosene. but it all turned out pretty well.
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
The investigator asked if we were sharing a pitcher of margaritas. I corrected him and explained that we each had our own.
Oh you have a half-brother? Why that's right up my alley! Let's cause family strife
Tearing families apart since 2011.
I have more sex toys than shoes - HOW AM I SINGLE?!?!?
No one should ever be so high that they forget the food. That's just...its a violation of God and Nature, of the very laws that we live by!
I just found one of your beard hairs in my oatmeal.
Are you awake? I feel like I need to confess my sins to someone not on this side of the country.
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
My vape juice got mixed up with the astroglide.
Wow..I bet that tasted bad.
Not tasted.
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
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