I was taking a piss and started puking. I pissed myself and made a mess in the bathroom. Passed out, then got up and went back out from 11pm to 5am.
I changed 4 diapers and slept horribly in our hot apt. Now, I'm at my inlaws house watching the Rangers get pummeled. Oh how our lives differ.
life lesson #1: a fart during an awkward silence between 2 strangers doesnt make it less awkward.
We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
It just feels so wrong throwing away the condoms into her Hello Kitty trashcan
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
Never underestimate the healing power of vomiting and a bath.
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
Well this lady at the bar told me I was a natural on the tambourine and that it was my God given talent. and then she gave me a tambourine.
St Patricks day needs to be raged like youve never raged before. Like youre in the desert and it starts raining beer. Like it's the day the announced the 21st amendment (which is the one that ended prohibition)
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
I was super proud of him for making a mature relationship decision, and then I remembered that he cheated on her. With me.
He tried to do the do on me last night and my exact words were "stay away from my princess parts. they're renovating."
That last one reminds me of the time we smoked that foot-long joint and by the time we'd finished we were so stoned we applauded it.
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
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