I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
The jerky fairy visited my fridge. It's glorious.
I refuse to have sex with you and your eBay condoms.
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
The only thing I'm asking santa for is my period.
And vodka?
And vodka.
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
I guess she was just worried I'd end up sleeping with you again
It's not too late to disappoint her you know...
walked into my roommates bathroom to her throwing up a quesadilla while singing come on skinny taco
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
She was drunk, dancing on the table. Until the table leg completely broke off and she fell on the ground and broke her front tooth straight off. Worse news is there making her pay for the table
Randomize
