For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
theres no cameras in the kitchen right? cause i dont wana get fired for peeing in the kitchen in a cup
I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
The manager of the bar we were at the night before came to my house today giving me coupons. Apperently you and i won karaoke night which is a prize of 300 beer dollars. No idea what beer dollars means nor do i have any memory of doing karaoke but lets go back tonight.
My broken door handle makes it really inconvient for when i need to puke at red lights.
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
weekly advice from mom, "Drink vodka, it las hess calories"
Dude. Going to the Theme park the day after the 4th of July was the worst idea I've ever had.
Oh my god and he smells like heaven wrapped in a beard of knowledge
Hi you snuggled with me in my bed in a maid outfit
Is it weird that the best sex I've ever had was to Barbara Streisand's Christmas album?
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
You fell out of his top bunk onto his set of golf clubs. After seeing blood on your leg, you proceeded to sing "the first cut is the deepest" while sprawled on the golf clubs
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
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