google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
not my fault. i got her to believe he wrote an oasis song. he still managed to find a way to make sure no girl ever gets near his penis.
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
Do you ever wonder how many people have prayed for you to be a better person?
They installed a lotion dispenser in the bathroom at work... its like they want me to masturbate on the clock...
He put up a Facebook album attempting to sell off their Harvard furniture. Items for sale include: his friend, a broken lamp, an item described as a 'carpet and/or sleeping bag', a pair of paint stained cargo pants, size 'Tyler', and a self proclaimed $3 bottle of wine, which he is offering for $2
I just did something so unspeakable in the panera bathroom that their health score dropped 10 points.
Do pleather leggings scream im easy on a first date?
The highlight of the night was when he yelled "WAS THIS CONDOM MADE FOR TODDLERS??"
I'm told I threw my cigarettes at the TV one by one Shouting about the cast of Community.
You told me that you were as fast as lightning and you wanted to race me. Then you faceplanted after falling down the stairs.
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
I love FaceTime, every time you ring me the morning after its like I went home with your one night stand too.
He's a security blanket. A security blanket who FUCKS.
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