Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
Why are handjobs necessary in class?
Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
so I finished the entire bottle...next thing I know, it's 8 am and I wake up on the fucking beach in the low tide with a family standing about 30 feet from me just staring.
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
Another night, another sound of my neighbor almost having an orgasm.
And she used to have such long ones. Sad.
You know you have a great job when you need a DD home from work at 6pm.
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
We tried to make ramen in a glass bowl on the stove. They called facilities to pick the glass out of the door
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
At least I know that however bad my life gets and how low I can feel I'll never feel shitting in a red robin parking lot low
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
Spent 38 bucks on dollar wells last night. I'm pretty sure my liver is staging a mutiny right now.
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
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