My mom came into my room and told me to flip off the tv. I gave it the middle finger. Note to self: STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT
I'm going to save the lime from my McDonald's salad to use in my Corona later tonight.
I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
How has he not realized you're pregnant?
Spanx.
I just snorted a line of adderall through a rolled up business card for the Michigan Law Admissions Office.... Tell me I'm not motivated
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
I usually just read books and meditate to an aquatic soundtrack of sea walrus's mating. But ill choose coors light instead
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
You straight up wore me out. This should be a proud moment for you. It's almost like my penis is asking for a timeout. But not really
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
So I'm at early voting and the group of ladies behind me is talking about voting no on 2 and my gummy is kicking in, thank lawd
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
Randomize
