he asked me if i had ever jacked off high and then referred to it as a "man-to-man question"
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
She greeted me with a new giants jersey and an opening day blowjob. this is true love.
Sweet. Warning: i have been drinking at work since 4. Plan accordingly.
She insisted on cleaning her room in the dark. 5 minutes in, she forgot what she was doing and started putting shirts on instead of hanging them up.
The guy who bit me so hard two nights ago that I had to put Neosporin on my nipple and the guy in my bed right now are two different people. Help
Oh shit. My drunken car sex is on Google Earth.
My arrest report says I was found in midtown "performing lewd and lascivious acts on top of art meant for public display and enjoyment".
I wonder if you're allowed to smoke pot at Denver bronco games now...
Apparently fireball doesn't mix well with my no carb diet
Yes, ur purse got stole with our condo keys in it but my slut ass saved us and we had a place to stay, AND I got to choke a motherfucker while riding him. Thats taking one for the team.
someone at the bars was yelling at the bouncer to let him in because he "just passed through the 7 levels of the candy cane forrest" soulmate?
go meet him and give him your number.
I think next time I give head I'm gonna try making the chewbacca noise.
I look forward to it
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
Where are you guys?
Drunk
Randomize
