when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
I*** M*****, this is your dignity texting you. I ditched you when you started hitting on bros and old sailor men last night. My friend Sarah has pictures to prove it.
Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
she's not going to take you seriously with an empty 40 and a sombrero on your head.
She threw up on me during morning sex and now Im pretty sure I just saw a woman die at 7-eleven. This is way too much for a Monday morning
I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN.
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.
Oh my god I'm so bored. The virgin is so disinteresting when I'm not trying to cum on her face.
Ugh why does it have to be margarita Monday. Why can't it be pants off dance off beer pong but with jager Monday.
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
Who brings a stripper to breakfast at the dining hall? What was the plan? Impress her with his meal plan?
Randomize
