i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
filled out health questionnaire for lower premiums a little bit too honestly. Literally got assigned a life coach.
I ended up in a shower with 9 people and a bunch of unopened beer last night. I think I got peed on. Hands were everywhere. We sold the peed on beer to people knocking on the hotel room door.
Wow, now I'm sad I didn't go.
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
we went from five shot glasses to three in one night. we lost 'badass' and gumbi, but the ninja turtle survived. courtney says to avoid any more casualties we're not allowed to use shot glasses past 1am. and we're not allowed to throw them
I'm definitely not at Wal-Mart eating jalapeno poppers with an elevated blood alcohol content
I swear you won't find cereal in your washer machine again.
I was a plus one at an intervention for a person I didn't know.
If a treadmill opens up I'll run next to him and then fall off so he has to give me mouth to mouth
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
Is it weird that my mother is taking body shots off my gf after meeting once?
Shit day. Some kids decided to open my car at 3 AM while I was at work and the alarm went off. I went after them with a sword but they were minors so I didn't kill them.
Randomize
