I hope you fall in a pool of honey in an immensely populated region of bears.
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
The gyno asked how many partners i've had... I said ummmm she goes ok then i'll just put down ten.
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
He told me he wanted to sleep but I touched his penis and listened to his heart beat start racing. I knew sleeping was bullshit.
Use your nursing skills for good, not evil.
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
There are people taking shots out of a turtle shell.
After we had sex he made me watch a Top Gun highlight video...
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
They filled a kiddie pool with lube and glitter.
I just woke up hand cuffed to the bar and shirtless, so yeah I think I need you to come get me.
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
My roommate wasn't home and I was too drunk and tired so I peed in the trash can. Twice.
I’m sorry my lady boner messed up your mojo!!
Randomize
