Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
His hands were made for my vagina.
I had to stop mid sex to take my turn on words with friends so he wouldn't get suspicious. Hookup of the night helped me. We won.
She called my landing strip a "vagina mohawk"....
Lesbians are weird.
Went to the doctor's today. The lady took one look at my throat and said "oh god"
Too much penis in there.
I'm going out with a guy whose nickname is Shark Week cause he'll eat anyone. I'm very excited.
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
I realized I used a copy of a biography of JFK as pillow last night...
Happy Fourth.
I'm high and having a granola buffet this has got to be the healthiest I have ever been
They asked me my level of pain at the hospital and I told them I called my ex 6 times
Just laying in bed, snuggling my cat, and pondering whether I'd like to attend a swingers party this evening...
Gary just stuck his dick in his Guinness. I can't even make this up
the party picked up after I got pretty drunk...I got kicked in the fucking head by a tiny lesbian...she was 5'1" I did not think she could do it...i was very wrong
Yesterday I febreezed my bed in between gentleman callers
Look, I am sorry I shaved your cat...but get over it.
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