you went up to their shower, tripped in it, accidentally turned it on and then claimed that you like to "test everyone's showers"
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
Woke up this morning to my mom on the phone with my dad saying, "It's probably just your prostate." Reasons to move out. Go.
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
I cant prove it..but im almost positive that you were just outside my window watching me while eating out of a bag of Cheetos...
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?
How can I not totally like a guy that told me my boobs were too big for me to be taught how to play golf?
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
I wish I could just hang out in ERs.
He was rocking just a diaper, shoes, and a gun. Sadly, I would still hit it.
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
i can eat my weight in tater tots. don't test me, bitch
My New Years resolution is to not hook up with random guys.
Mine is to not hook up with anyone who has a kid.
Randomize
