Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
it was 5AM and you were field goal kicking solo cups into the sink
she texted him the burrito order while she was puking in the Del Taco parking lot...
Just saw a white bronco on my way home from work and the license plate said "NOT OJ"
Okay good. And who the fuck put a condom on my foot. That shit hurt
Nothing like puking into an empty cooler at a red light on the way to get plan b.
Can we talk about the fact that I plucked weed off your ass this morning like it's a normal thing to do?
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
Debating whether the Plan B I had this morning would go under breakfast or lunch in my food log.
You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
The cops wrote boobs in the police report. ...vandalism is our calling
You know youre getting old when you I.D. the person trying to take you home to be sure they're over 25. Help me.
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
Randomize
