Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
Do you remember when I jumped into your arms and you farted?
How am I suppose to look him in the face when I know a commercial lasts longer than he does?
Phosphoglyceraldehydration... why the fuck is this a word
Wake up, take the dog to the trails, puke in the woods. More days should start like this.
I can't answer my phone I'm at work
I slept with a male stripper last night. Priorities
You could become Eskimo brothers with my dad. How can you pass that up? You pussy.
11/10 would buy him a McLobster
moral of my life: don't tell a guy you want to have sex with him. he'll get back together with his ex.
I'm like a freaking volcano of life and sexual frustrations
I'm sorry I've been mean recently but tbh it really turns me on seeing you cry so it might happen a lot..... You're a pretty crier I don't get it
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
Are you telling me right now that the weed man sexted you?
THE WEED MAN SEXTED ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I'm fucked-out. That state of being high between fucked up and passed out.
Randomize
