My cousins just decided to make a catapult to spread my Grandpa's cremated remains. I love my family.
you were carrying around a glass of vodka telling everyone it was Russian water
i'm not entirely sure that 'not getting kicked out of the bar until it got dark' really classifies as 'doing better'
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
I wonder what it's like for my roommate to live bicuriously thro my sex life
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
He has an accent, blue cross AND gainful employment. Just saying, he's going to urgent care once I'm done with him
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
I was cock-blocked by a swat team last night.
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
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