took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
She got all mad because she said it was "unprofessional" to tell my manager to go fist herself.
She always manages to outslut me. I can't keep up
he tried to breastfeed my turtle
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
I'm putting "buy a bottle of scotch" on my "productive things to do to procrastinate studying for finals" list
I only want to make out with him. Unless I get hungry. In that case I will take him home and screw him as a distraction from eating.
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !
So then we ended up at a bar full of navy SEALs and I got one of them to take his shirt off, then I felt him up
I feel like 31-year old me is 21-year old me's hero
Word to the wise, never look up your hot young doctors on Facebook before you're discharged. You will find things and no longer be able to take them seriously.
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
He's eating me out right now. That's how bad he is.
Randomize
