Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
LSHMSFOAIDMT = laughing so hard my sombrero falls off and I drop my taco.
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
OH MY GOD I CAN'T WAIT TO BONE YOUR EX BOYFRIEND. HOW AWKWARD IS THIS?
I feel like you guys are talking about real things and have real problems and I'm just over here like 'should I take muscle relaxers or get drunk tonight?'
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
Vodka, MiraLAX and Gatorade are perfect for the night before a colonoscopy
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