Hey when you come over to pick me up in the mornin bring a camera. This is going to be legendary. Don't knock.... They might cover up
so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house
I need to keep friends like you around just in case hell grades on a curve.
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
Living room yoga. I'm too hungover to deal with anyone else's chi today.
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
Well I'm about 60% wine, 30% pure rage and 10% tears at the moment and I'm disappointed in how little alcohol is in me
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
Please tell me I didn't send you a dick pic in the middle of Peter Pan..
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
Who the fuck stole my fridge again
Are you drunk already?
Not already - at LAST.
If people had ratings on Tinder I'd give you 5 out of 5 stars.
Randomize
