It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
well i was about to unbutton his pants but then i realized they had an elastic waste-band, so no, that didnt happen
I'm ashamed of you 12 hours later and 200 miles away
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
She gave me a foot massage while her friend rode me. Your gf puked into the oscolating fan. How were our nites alike?
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
I paid your brother in tostitos to drive me home.
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
You kept whispering to me that the guy making your burrito was an angel.
i think if a sober person was watching us they would have not thought we were witty
Drunk me says 72 hours of Mexican Viagra and room service.Sober me says we stopped being lovers for a reason after the last lost weekend.
This woman at the blackjack table is sitting on a pile of newspaper so she can pee at her seat and never miss a hand.
Randomize
