I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
She's thinkin about havin beer pong at her reception... She's walkin a fine line between trashy and the best idea ever
hey dont come home for a while, moms drunk and is telling the story of 'how she met dad at that orgy' again
Just finished texting the 27th male name in my phone that i don't recognize. none of them were the hott kid i made out with last night. the search continues.
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
I'm not sure which is more depressing, the fact that the hospital is making me put together a living will before surgery, or that all i'll be leaving behind is 25k in student loan debt
The cop was yelling at you as you layed on the sidewalk and you wouldn't take him seriously cause you thought it was some dude in a cop costume.
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
Split a bottle of Johnny Walker and then decided to eat a shit ton of peanut butter. That was a rough bed to wake up in
She just asked me if I was going to stay the night. I responded "I know that we are upside down".
How was the party
I came home with only one shoe, a t shirt tied around my shoeless foot and I was covered in motor oil. Oh and my shorts were inside out. So you tell me
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