You give one guy a hand job and suddenly everyone wants to get with you
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
I love you. Thanks for all the blowjobs.
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
Oh God! I'm naked from the waist down playing records. Too drunk. I don't even know what to do.
Balls out but with a shirt on. Eating ravioli. I don't know how to deal with this.
yea last night was a repeat of newyears...exept this time it ivolved a fish costume, throw up, a hole in the roof, and cops...lots of cops
I felt so bad for you. Drunk Rachael wanted nothing more than to crawl into the cop car and give you a hug. Luckily Mollied/Barred out Rachael convinced Drunk Rachael this was a terrible idea. So I ran. I have your keys btw
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
I just learned how to imitate a trains smokestack. The downside is it makes you look like you ate cocaine. The upside is YOU LOOK LIKE A TRAIN
There's weed in my toothpaste. Explain.
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
Im so fucked up I'm drinking baileys and coffee just to stay awake.
It's 6 in the afternoon?
Randomize
