They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
I fuked that chick last night and she kept saying, "oh...oh....oh", like Bill Lumberg
so what did you do?
I did the mash I did the monster mash It was a graveyard smash!
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
it looked like a condom graveyard when i woke up. they were everywhere
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
I don't understand how she could dump me AFTER we had shower sex. I'm fucking great at shower sex
Shrimp lo Mein doused in green apple Smirnoff is a rare delicacy only a few get to experience..guess I should consider myself lucky
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
Nothings harder than putting on a frozen condom.. or should I say softer
He was peeing on the back wall of a building. He would have been okay if the building hadn't been a police station.
Caprisun cuts tequila surprisingly well...
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
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