Add "its too hot" to reasons why I don't get fucked anymore
They still haven't come up with a cure for a hangover; good luck cancer.
She threw up a whole curly fry. A. WHOLE. CURLY. FRY.
There are Star Wars cutouts in his basement. Obi Wan Kenobe watched me give him a handjob.
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
I can hear her blowing you man. All I hear is her saying 'yeah' over and over again.
I only want to make out with him. Unless I get hungry. In that case I will take him home and screw him as a distraction from eating.
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
The ONE weekend I don't put anything up my nose, and it decides to bleed like crazy
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
Sexy intern needs to have caveman sex with me
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
Did I tell you about the swingers? Because I think they're trying to trap me.
Randomize
