Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
Today I realized that I've had whole drunk relationships with people. And sober me has and wants no part in it.
this guy literally just gave me a gold star sticker for the "stellar" blow job i gave him. ashamed? i think not.
How are you going to be there by 9am?
Relax I always go to these conferences hung over
You say that like it's a positive quality
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
Fuck. The basement bathroom I've been getting head in for 6 months just went 'Out of Service'.
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
fucked a girl in the dry storage closet at work. knocked over a whole rack of tomato paste and pinto beans. and also i really hope my manager doesn't review this footage from the security camera
I did way too many drugs this past week for having a broken nose #commitment
I think I swiped left on my soulmate
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
my goal is to never have a bac of 0.0 the whole time while in the state of florida, which means i have to chug a beer before i cross the state line
Randomize
