I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
Why are handjobs necessary in class?
aaaannd alcoholism beats pride. it's like grown-up rock, paper, scissors
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
You were jumping on the trampoline and screaming that you couldn't feel the fire.
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
so gross sitting on a warm chair at a restaurant..you just know a fat person was sitting there shoveling food into their face for hours.
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
Well I was going to go home but vodka happened.
You kept whispering to me that the guy making your burrito was an angel.
We were so sore from having sex that we decided to fix it with more sex. It's the hair of the dog for sex hangover.
I just loudly threatened to kill a self checkout machine
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
I googled my name and pictures of you drinking showed up. Way to steal my thunder....
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
Randomize
