Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
Ok Hollywood, I get it. Megan Fox is hot. Now she is in a movie where she is so hot that dudes just fucking die. Great.
scratch lunch, i just found about 7 more dicks drawn on my back
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
It was so weird. She left to go to the bathroom and her older sister leaned towards me with a creepy smile and said, "You don't deserve her" and then continued to stare at me with a crazy expression for the rest of the evening.
That's kinky shit dude.
THEY SELL PREFROZEN MARGARITAS AND THEY COME WTH A STRAW. MY PRIORITIES ARE IN ORDER
Don't be alarmed by all the Dick cakes in the fridge. But please don't eat..i accidentally broke one in half you guys can eat that one. Its labeled free Dick
yeah, never be friends with someone with shitty eyebrows.. they obviously already make poor life choices
I can insert a female catheter, but I cannot grill a cheese.
I swear, I make more use of my creative writing major with sexting than I do with anything else
Are you in a position where you can bring me some nachos?
i woke up on the couch at 5:24am, hangover, craving for some ribs, but i only had a bag of cheetos and a half empty beer. man what a breakfast.
He also sent me nipple clamps because romance is NOT dead
Randomize
