I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
im so sorry the vomit froze your passenger door shut... you should have stopped.
The last thing I remember is trying to split my bridesmaid dress down the back like the incredible hulk.
and you succeeded.
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
I feel like there's no sexy way to pull 12 condoms out of your bra.
you know, i'm always afraid you're going to think i only want you for sex because i only text you when i'm horny
speaking of, guess what i'm thinking about
Can you come pick me up and take me to breakfast then the police station?
Where's your car?
The girl I brought home apparently stole it
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
Met a beautiful Irishman two nights in a row. I may never come back.
Her oh Gods turned into oh god I shouldn't be doing this I'm engaged.
Randomize
