we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
I pretty much can't stop smiling when I talk to you. Even when you talk about disease and infectious diarrhea.
Hi, I just found this phone under my seat at a brewers game and seeing as you're entered in as 'fillllatio' I figured I'd ask you if you know the illiterate ass who owns this phone. Thanks :)
he texted me at 1 in the morning to ask if i wanted to come over and play in the snow with him
at least he gets points for a creative booty call
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
My biggest accomplishment thus far this summer is having sex 5 weeks after hip surgery.
I drunkenly took 3 laxatives last night since I felt fat.... this is going to be a rough morning
Ps I'm glad our relationship hasn't progressed into having to get married so we legally can't testify against each other
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
How do we stop her downward spiral?
Wine. For us.
Colombian exchange intern from my Mom's friend's ranch loves me, and is staying the night because we got each other drunk. Successful Christmas? I think yes.
Odd start to the day - the FBI just showed up at my apartment.
I feel like my foot is being amputated. Or maybe it's the vodka. I couldn't tell you.
So I forgot to ask, how was that bartender you slept with two weeks ago?
Google chlamydia.
Randomize
