bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
Is it physically possible to shit out my own bone marrow? Because if not, then I need to see a doctor immediately.
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
Then she yelled something like "YOU HAVE SO MANY FORKS!" before collapsing on the floor
you broke a plate. told her her wedding china was ugly and you were doing her a favor. then proceeded to break every plate you could get your hands on.
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
i just found out the cashier has a picture of my junk in her phone.
You called me at 3 am laughing like an idiot. Apparently you consider breaking out of the hospital to be a lifetime achievement.
YOUR VAGINA IS SO CUTE IT'S LIKE A LITTLE MACAROON
I think it might be the guy sitting next to me. I've concluded he HAS to be smuggling insane amounts of onions in his wardrobe to smell like that
Idk if I want to put a bra on
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
Randomize
