dude...I wrote 15 jersey shore quotes on her body. she is going to do the walk of shame with snookie on her forehead.
Is it creepy to message a girl and say you had me at stocked liquor cabinet?
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
I drink more single than I do in relationships. Except with assface.
Oh my fucking god I saw the pictures. What the mother fucking fuck. Destroy the pictures. Destroy the fucking pictures.
Please confirm the destruction of the pictures. NOW.
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
Wait I'm all alone with a guy and his turtle
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
The married guy I've been fucking broke it off because I'm not a trump supporter and don't share his "traditional values".
"I mean like shit happens" should never be an excuse for anything
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