Kareoke will never be a sober sport
I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
if my vagina gave out awards, he should be preparing acceptance speaches for the oscar, the heisman and the nobel peace prize.
I just realized last night I drunk-bought a flight to Florida for this weekend...kinda torn between the price and the potential of awesomeness
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
I have 250 contacts there has to be someone sober to take me to taco bell
I woke up and watched my kitten suck on his nipple. Way too hungover to intervene. He thought it was me, so he just giggled and mumbled "mmm girl."
Seriously? God I hope he wasn't lactating.
......... Poor kitty
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
You're more than welcome to join us! There's red velvet cake and apparently my pants are open for business I didn't consent to this
Im pretty sure my housekeeper high fived her on the way out this morning
I miss you, too. It's hard to sleep without anything licking my head.
The appetizer at the dinner I went to tonight was Klonopin and a Bloody Mary.
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