I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
i just realized i've been trying to levitate the potatoe chip out of her hand for the past ten minutes. i think i smoked to much.
The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
It was all fun and games until Tim shit on the end table
this is not real life
it never is. after midnight never counts.
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
Yes, but it's not new to me. It's like every time a new guy finds out I'm a squirter it's a novelty so they make me squirt and squirt and squirt until their bed is completely soaked. And then afterwards they complain that there isn't a dry bit to sleep on. No shit Sherlock.
So for future reference.... it's a little unnerving when I can't get hold of you, and the last communication we had was, "Oh fuck... It's tequila"
Does it qualify as sexting if you're both pretending to be fictional characters?
I'm not sure whether to be proud of you or weirded out.
we got kicked out of the bar last night for sneaking into the back kitchen and eating handfulls of cheese in the walk in fridge
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
Do you remember last night?
Just that I fell down a hill with my penis out and the emt talked to me.
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
Randomize
