Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
the people of mcdonalds are all starring at me & this dude like they know we just slept together
everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
I wish my period boobs were my regular boobs.
Is it possible to make a milkshake in a martini shaker or am I gonna need a blender?
Before attempting to fly away into the night you asked me to take care of your sister. I agreed.
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
I just tried to order ice cream on my bagel. I think I should just call it
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
so much tequila, so little girl.
I just traded a couple nudes for pizza delivery. Call me lazy, easy, or an entrepreneur, but either way I'll have dominoes in 15 minutes.
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
The dog peed on the neighbors baby Jesus. No wonder she thinks we're the devil.
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