They should make a Rosetta Stone that allows men to understand what the fuck women are actually trying to say.
One of the cleaning ladies on my floor just screamed from the bathroom
don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
all i wanna do is drink skittled vodka, fuck my gf, and pass out in my neighbors hot tub naked
My middle name is suave and my vagina shoots rainbows, what else would you expect?
The problem with that is that my car has been stolen
I saw a groundgog last night outside my back door. I now have a new wedding gift idea.
No celebraish? But today's the day that Jesus, Bruce Springsteen, and a flock of bald eagles came down from the heavens in fighter jets with electric guitars and M-16s a blazon, saying "Hey America, fuck the Red Coats, it's time to party"
Im gonna get home and destroy this bag of chicken nuggets with my soul.
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
Do NOT. I repeat. DO NOT call me little one after we have fucked. In no world is that ok. Even jesus agrees.
Fuck the system, do you have any medieval weapons?
Randomize
